Oh Fall, how I love thee...

Fall/Autumn is by far my favorite season.

• It's not hot, but it's not cold. I love the brisk, cool air.
• Comfy clothes: hoodies and velour jogging suits. Can't get enough of them!
• I can still get away with flip flops on some days.
• Halloween festivities. Who doesn't love being creative and getting dressed up? And it's the one day of the year women aren't looked down upon (as much) for dressing slutty.
• Fall reminds me of good memories. Although I am no longer dating my first serious boyfriend, we started dating in the fall and had a blast.
• Thanksgiving. It's one of my favorite holidays. I love preparing and cooking for the holiday, spending time with the fam, and not having to worry about buying presents for anyone (However, my Nonna gives all of us money to buy our Christmas gifts). Oh, and not to mention the day before and after Thanksgiving (Black Wednesday - one of the biggest going out nights of the year; Black Friday - shopping and sales extravaganza!)
  

However, with Fall it means that winter is just around the corner. As much as I love skiing and decorating, baking, and shopping for Christmas, I despise winter!

• It's freezing! Not to mention I work downtown right by the lake and it's always a million times colder there.
• Slush. When the snow gets all mooshy and dirty, slush is absolutely disgusting. Especially when you fall in it walking to the train and your toosh is wet the whole train ride home.
• Driving. It takes forever to warm your car up (unless you're a lucky bastard who has an automatic start). And it takes three times longer to get anywhere when it snows or there are icy roads.
• You don't get snow days when you're an adult.
• You're broke from buying Christmas presents.
• You can't wear flip flops anymore and are subject to wearing big, bulky jackets.

And You Got Married Why?

As long as I could remember, I've always wanted to get married and have babies. When I started college my plan was to date someone throughout college, graduate and get engaged, be engaged for a year, and then be married by the time I was 23. Clearly, that hasn't happened considering I just turned 24. Surprisingly enough, I am OK with that. If I would have gotten engaged around 21 or 22, I highly doubt I would have remained engaged or married to that person for the simple fact that I was still growing up and learning who I am. But that also doesn't mean that I don't hope to meet the man of my dreams sometime soon. :-)

Maybe you shouldn't be married if...

Just because you get pregnant/get someone pregnant does not mean you have to get married. OK, so you're not married and you got pregnant/got someone pregnant. Yes, that's complicated and stressful. But why complicate things even further by getting married?! If you love the person, go for it, but do not marry someone just because you have a bun in the oven/knocked someone up.

Second semester of my senior year of college, one of my girlfriends set me up with a friend of hers. He was just my type: Italian, good looking, and last, but certainly not least: a deuschbag. We talked on and off for about a year and a half and then I just had enough. Well, about a month ago. I met up with my friend whom I haven't seen since graduation. We were talking and she asked me if I still talk to Mr. Deuschbag. I responded no and proceeded to tell her what happened. She was surprised by everything and her sister chimed in with, "You're better off, he's going to be a Daddy!"

Mind you, this man can barely wipe his own ass let alone take care of a baby! My friend told me the gossip she had heard about the situation. Apparently, Mr. Deuschbag asked one of his friends, "Do I gotta marry her?" His friend responded with, "Well, if you care about her and want to live together and raise a family you can, but you don't have to." Mr. Deuschbag responded with, "Well, she has insurance." Lovely. Don't we all wish we had a man as romantic as him?

If you have a crush on someone and hate anyone who talks to him. I was recently told by my best friend that a girl we know does not like me because I was talking and flirting with a guy we all know. YOU ARE MARRIED!! YOU SHOULD NOT CARE!! AND IF YOU DO, MAYBE YOU SHOULD NOT BE MARRIED! Yes, the guy is good looking. Yes, I was flirting. But honestly, just because I'm flirting with someone does not mean I'm interested. And just because we were flirting does not mean anything happened! We flirted and talked at a get together, went to another bar for drinks (where I had other friends there), and he drove me to my car. We ended the night with a hug. I think someone not liking me for that reason as absolutely ludicrous! SERIOUSLY?!

If you are grabbing girls' butts. Last week I met up with a friend for a few after work cocktails. We only work a few blocks from each other and there was an Oktoberfest celebration going on nearby. My friend was with a couple of his co-workers and invited a few other friends who work nearby as well. One of his co-workers was married, but clearly his wife and child at home did not stop him from grabbing 2 of the girls' butts. After he did so, they both shot him a look. My big mouth proceeded to say, "Hey! Isn't that a ring on your finger?" He replied, "Yeah, so what?" SO WHAT?! It is one thing to innocently flirt with a woman, but to touch and grab is a no no! After I called him out, he moved onto hitting on me. I know I just said innocently flirting is OK, but there is a limit to it. It is hard to offend me, but when you offend me and make me completely uncomfortable, you've drawn the line. And then I proceed to make you look like a fool by yelling, "B, get him away from me or I'm going to punch him!"

I understand, not everyone is perfect. I'm by no means perfect and have effed up in relationships a countless number of times. However, if you're not ready to be in a committed relationship and get your act together, maybe you're not ready to be married. Since I've never been married, I'm no expert on the issue, but I do know that you shouldn't marry someone because of their benefits, got them preggers, are in love with someone else, or like grabbing women's tooshes...

It's Amazing How Time Changes Things...

Over the past 2 weeks, I have seen 2 exes. The encounter with Ex #2 was no where near as awkward as it was with Ex #1.

Ex #1. My ex and I were extremely close throughout our relationship. We had gotten serious fast (which I truly believe is one of the reasons that caused us to break up) and he became one of my best friends. Nothing was ever awkward between us (we even laughed at the time he accidentally drooled in my mouth while making out). We told each other anything and everything. It really was an amazing relationship and I'm grateful to have had him in my life. However, when I saw him a couple weeks ago, it was by far one of the most awkward experiences. I was working at a town function in my hometown and he came up to the stand I was working with to talk to my 2 best friends. Mind you, he met them through me. And then turns to me and says, "Hi, how are you?" I wish I could have recorded this. Obviously, "Hi, how are you," is a wonderful starting point for a conversation and very polite. However, it was the way he said it and the face he made. I felt like I was someone he really didn't like or was a complete stranger to him. He carried on a conversation with my best friend for a bit and was himself. Yes, I know, we broke up, I shouldn't expect him to be jumping for joy to see me or be overly friendly. But after we broke up, we remained on good terms for several months and several months ago had a long conversation catching up. Everything was fine. So it just made me wonder what the awkwardness was for.

Ex #2. This guy was never per say my boyfriend, but we were seeing each other. He moved to Chicago for work, but had been traveling for work (spending several months in different states to work at the company's different locations). We would see each other frequently when he was back in town for Chicago. We had an amazing time together. We both enjoy eating, so we often tried new restaurants together and were able to just veg out and enjoy each other's company. We sort of drifted apart and stopped talking. We reconnected via Facebook a couple months ago and began talking again because he was going to be back in Chicago this past week. We hung out one night while he was here and it just wasn't the same. We talked and caught up, but that obviously didn't take a long time to do. He barely even tried to kiss me! Granted, I have had a cold and cough, but still!

Between these 2 experiences, it has really made me think how things change over time. We mature and learn from things that happen. Who knew someone you were 100% comfortable with would end up being someone you feel completely awkward around? If someone would have told me I wasn't going to end up with Ex #1 and we wouldn't even be able to have a conversation, I wouldn't have believed them. But shit happens and people change...

False Expectations...

I have a love/hate relationship with "chick flicks." I love them because who doesn't love a happy ending and seeing people hopelessly in love? However, I hate them because they give false expectations for love and relationships in the real world. I'm not saying people can't have their own "fairy tale endings," but come on! How many people really get that?

The reason I bring this up is because a guy I used to date was in town on business and only here for a few days. We had made plans to meet up after his business dinner the first night he was in town, but things were taking longer than he expected. No problem. I would never expect someone to not attend or leave a work function early for a casual get together. Since we didn't get to meet up that night, we agreed to meet up the next night. We made plans for him to come check out my apartment and then head over to a bar nearby that we always used to go to. However, him coming over turned into having to go to an event after his conference and then taking his co-workers out for dinner.

I'm not going to lie, I was bummed. I sat on my couch watching TV and thought, "Maybe he'll call later and tell me to buzz him in because he's outside and wanted to surprise me." And then I thought, "You fool! That type of thing only happens in movies." And I was right. He never showed up to surprise me.

I think chick flicks and romance movies are great to get you out of reality for a moment. I also think they can make you more optomistic about things. However, they're also a real let down when you realize your average Joe Schmo probably isn't going to turn out to be Prince Charming or be as passionate as Noah from The Notebook...